So, this is my first time on the blog as me. not the administrator me...just me.
here goes it.
i have a small role in defunkt's current play, "the garden party". (defunkt only uses lower case letters and so i will compose the rest of the entry with that construct. hee.hee.). i remember when i saw the audition notice....it stated that the audition would entail cold readings. i hate cold reads and thought that it would be good practice. i was centimeters away from chickening out...i actually walked away from the theatre several times before entering the front door. eventually i found my way in. the audition WAS good practice and i was even offered a role. the smallest role, in fact. i was excited and relieved at first. the material was challenging and i found a strange comfort in the smallness of the role I was cast..... this comfort soon turned to anxiety.
i discovered quickly how difficult small roles are....how specific you must be before you even step onto the stage. you are only given a few moments to push the play forward, to help move the other characters along their arc. you have to create your own momentum, your own journey. you must paint a landscape for yourself that the audience does not directly experience. you must. this has been an incredibly humbling experience for me. i have been shaken, slapped and uprooted. there is an ocean of insecurity within me that is being transformed into something powerful and i am so thankful for the opportunity. every night i sit backstage i am faced with this question: why am i doing this? why do i come to a dark theatre 4 nights a week and sit in the dressing room for 60 out of the 80 minutes that the play is running? why? well, i do it because i love this process. all of it. it is hard and it is beautiful and it has become my heartbeat.
sarah
2 comments:
And you buy coloring books to keeep yourself occupied in the meantime (been there, had to do similar things) during those long stretches backstage.
It was really great to see you thursday; it was the first time I've seen you as an actor rather than the office manager. You knocked my socks off with your schophrenic telegrams :)
Jack
I loved your part for three reasons.
1) You had the recurring-slightly-breaking-the-fourth-wall joke of being the actress in a small role that makes each recurring entrance/presence more dramatic.
2) You got to recite the telegrams from a person that was dictacting to one person while arguing with another.
3) I got's t'look at 'n stare at ya.
Maybe this is a 4th-ish reason. I loved the play, but after thirty minutes, the absurdity got to be a little tiresome. When you were on stage, the play got a slight reset or refresh from that adbsurdity.
Scott(y)
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